Qt the end of the night, when the landlord calls "time",
Every bloke's popped in the gents to do mum a bum-crime.
Screw, screw, screw your dad, firmly up the bum,
Make him shout and make him scream, then fill him up with come!
Mum's a total Nazi,
In her demand for only big lads doing her up the "fartsie."
Mum recalls the nights watching BBC Ceefax,
Post-shift waiting for her arsehole to relax,
From being at completely 'max.'
Dad's got a lot on his plate,
Mainly shit and piss - and it doesn't taste great.
Dad's listening to Wham, "Careless Whisper,"
Whilst anally ingesting a Cadbury's Whisper.
Bogs-bloke's caps n cocks a doffin,'
As they slowly file past mum's nob-coffin.
Only the tensile strength of mum's callused, leathery pissflaps
Prevents a complete anal prolapse
Dad fondly remembers his shortlived tenure,
As editor of the Mothercare brochure.
Head Bogs-Bloke fires the starter gun,
And we're off! Another night of mum's bum fun!
